Difference between revisions of "Grand Army"

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The Grand Army is mightier than all other armies combined. It is led by [[Generalissimo]] [[Snoutwit]]. Its headquarters is at [[GAHQ]] in [[Albrook]], with branch offices in [[Foo]], [[Dantic]] and [[OtherWeb]].
+
The Grand Army is mightier than all other armies combined. It is led by [[Generalissimo]] [[Celiose Cole]]. Its headquarters is at [[GAHQ]] in [[Albrook]].
  
 
==GA Organization==
 
==GA Organization==
 
===Command===
 
===Command===
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* The [[House of Lords]] and the [[Alliance Congress]] provide political oversight. In order for a Grand Army Bill to become law, it must pass through both chambers. Often, two different versions of a bill will emerge from the House and the Congress; the two bodies will, when this happens, meet together and hammer out their differences over racks of barbeque ribs and thick, melted nacho cheese dip and chips.
+
* The [[House of Lords]] and the [[Alliance Congress]] provide political oversight
−
* [[Generalissimo]] - serves as overall commander. Snoutwit is widely praised throughout the Web as a champion frisbee-throwist and hack-sacker.
+
* [[Generalissimo]] - serves as overall commander
−
* [[Soldierly Council]] - top leaders and commanders in the GA, sometimes (but rarely) convened as a whole body to advise the Generalissimo. Snoutwit began the practice of forming the Soldierly Council into an acapella group that competes once a year against the military cabinets of GACA member nations in [[Southtown]] (the home of all battles of all bands).  
+
* [[Soldierly Council]] - top leaders and commanders in the GA, sometimes (but rarely) convened as a whole body to advise the Generalissimo.  
−
** The rank of Lieutenant General is reserved for "the right hand man" of the Generalissimo. Three men have held this rank during active service in the history of the GA: [[Burzmale Julian]], [[Kuance Lero]], and [[Shane Lile]], although some people have been given this rank as an honorific upon retirement. Snoutwit gave this rank to his pet rabite, [[Lawrence]], who on the Soldierly Council is the commander responsible for grazing the Generalissimo's lawn.  
+
** The rank of Lieutenant General is reserved for "the right hand man" of the Generalissimo. Three men have held this rank during active service in the history of the GA: [[Burzmale Julian]], [[Kuance Lero]], and [[Torstensson Lenart]], although some people have been given this rank as an honorific upon retirement.
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** Rear Generals are responsible for the administration of an entire combat service. The Director of [[The Snopo]], the Chief of Air Operations, Chief of Naval Operations, Chief of Space Operations, and Supreme Commander of the [[Mobile Chefs Corps]] are given this rank. In theory the Chief of Land Operations would hold also this rank, but [[Snoutwit]] tends to assume that role as part of Generalissimo as a second hat or delegate it to [[Erdeny Cole]].
+
** Rear Generals are responsible for the administration of an entire combat service. The Director of [[The Celpo]], the Chief of Air Operations, Chief of Naval Operations, Chief of Space Operations, and Supreme Commander of the [[Malakim]] are given this rank. In theory the Chief of Land Operations would hold also this rank, but [[Celiose Cole]] tends to assume that role as part of Generalissimo as a second hat or delegate it to [[Torstensson Lenart]].
 
** Sub-Generals are field commanders of large units or in charge of the administration of non-combat offices such as [[GAPP]], OSLO, and others.
 
** Sub-Generals are field commanders of large units or in charge of the administration of non-combat offices such as [[GAPP]], OSLO, and others.
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====Members of the Soldierly Council====
+
 
−
*Generalissimo Snoutwit - Our Brave Generalissimo.
 
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*Lieutenant General Shane Lile - Also called Master of Sausages.
 
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*Lieutenant General Lawrence - Our Brave Generalissimo's pet rabite.
 
−
*Rear General [[Kevin the Great]] - Head of Grand Army Infinite Resources Bitch division.
 
−
*Rear General [[Antonio Desrodio]] - Head of the Kriegsnavee, a [[Damcyan]]ese. Was the principle advocate of incorporating pink leggings in the traditional white-and-gold GA uniforms. Addresses his seamen as "young men!"
 
−
*Rear General [[Croakingham]] - Head of the Galacto-Luftwaffe, GA aerospace. When Snoutwit isn't around, he has personal command of the Galacto-Luftwaffe's planet-eating, giant-robot flagship, the <i>[[Galactus]]</i>.
 
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*Rear General [[Kundaré Du Crême]] - Head of the Mobile Chef's Corps, a [[Sima]]n. French Frogs!?!
 
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*Rear General [[Praxer]] - Head of the [[Snopo]]. Some things <i>never</i> change. Ever.
 
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*Sub-General [[Erdeny Cole]] - Head of the storied GA Fourth Army. A significant and unforgettable character in Kupopolis.
 
−
*Sub-General [[Warmoogle]] - Head of the GA Ninth Army, a [[Kuvalla]]n. The Moogle of War!!!
 
−
*Sub-General [[X-Sonic]] - Head of the GA Eight Army, and the love child of Mega Man and Sonic the Hedgehog. His deeply troubling parentage is somehow the source of the Eighth Army's unbreakable morale.
 
  
 
===Branches and Offices===
 
===Branches and Offices===
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* [[GAPP]] - The Grand Army Peace Police, served as MPs for the GA. They are responsible for investigating crimes involving GA soldiers and officers, inlcuding enforcing the Grand Army Code of Military Justice (CMJ). They have jurisdiction across any national boundries when GA soldiers are involved.
 
* [[GAPP]] - The Grand Army Peace Police, served as MPs for the GA. They are responsible for investigating crimes involving GA soldiers and officers, inlcuding enforcing the Grand Army Code of Military Justice (CMJ). They have jurisdiction across any national boundries when GA soldiers are involved.
 
* OSLO - The Office of Supply, Logistics, and Ordinance is responsible for making sure that food, supplies, and ammunition reach the four corners of the Web.  
 
* OSLO - The Office of Supply, Logistics, and Ordinance is responsible for making sure that food, supplies, and ammunition reach the four corners of the Web.  
−
* Department of Lawrence - The GA office of the Generalissimo's pet rabite. This Non-Combat bureau within the GA is comprised of all the people Snoutwit has tasked with the care and feeding of his beloved animal companion. It includes the veritable army of groomers, walkers, and two small corporations responsible for producing non-toxic rubber squeaky toys and 100% organic pet food for Lawrence's use and consumption. Lawrence once had to rely on OSLO for his supplies, but eventually Snoutwit reasoned that the Grand Army had such deep pockets and [[infinite resources bitch|nigh inexhaustible resources]] that pretty Lawrence no longer had to settle for what the common soldier made do with.
 
  
 
===Combat Groups===
 
===Combat Groups===
 
* GA Ground Troops are divded into three main branches with strong identities:
 
* GA Ground Troops are divded into three main branches with strong identities:
−
** [[Frisbeediers]]
+
** [[Grenadiers]]
 
** [[Regulars]]
 
** [[Regulars]]
 
** [[GA Tank Troops]]
 
** [[GA Tank Troops]]
 
** [[Battlegroup]] was the GA term for a group of soldiers trained around a specialized purpose. Peaking with four during the Great War, now two are in service: the [[Desert Korps]] and the [[Airborne Battlegroup]] (converted to a unit specializing in orbital drops).  
 
** [[Battlegroup]] was the GA term for a group of soldiers trained around a specialized purpose. Peaking with four during the Great War, now two are in service: the [[Desert Korps]] and the [[Airborne Battlegroup]] (converted to a unit specializing in orbital drops).  
 
* [[Kriegsnavee]]
 
* [[Kriegsnavee]]
−
* [[Galacto-Luftwaffe]]
+
* [[Luftwaffe]]
 
* [[SAGA]]
 
* [[SAGA]]
−
* [[The Snopo]] is treated as a coequal combat branch
+
* [[The Celpo]] is treated as a coequal combat branch
 
* The [[Malakim]]
 
* The [[Malakim]]
  
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* GA Strategic Missile Command ('Strattom Com')
 
* GA Strategic Missile Command ('Strattom Com')
 
* UBC Defense Corps (Ultima/Biological/Chemical, also trained in dealing with Dark Matter weapons and other known weapons of mass destruction)
 
* UBC Defense Corps (Ultima/Biological/Chemical, also trained in dealing with Dark Matter weapons and other known weapons of mass destruction)
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* [[Mobile Chefs Corps]] (since Snoutwit is a Generalissimo of refined tastes, he never goes anywhere in the Web without this elite cadre of Grand Army chefs at his side. These cullinary masters are schooled in every cuisine known to the worlds of the Web, and like the Grand Army itself, is simply better than any other chefs corps fielded by any other nation [if only due to superior resources, numbers and training]. The MCC is headed by a Rear General who sits on the Soldierly Council)
 
  
  
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In GA organization, a formation consisting of multiple regiments is an "Army"; an "Army Group" is all of the forces (including air and sea forces) in a particular area. (ie Army Group Hyrule would include all military forces in Hyrule.)  
 
In GA organization, a formation consisting of multiple regiments is an "Army"; an "Army Group" is all of the forces (including air and sea forces) in a particular area. (ie Army Group Hyrule would include all military forces in Hyrule.)  
  
−
Particularly in peacetime, a GA Sub-General will wear many hats, and may have command of an army in addition to other duties. ([[Kundaré Du Crême]], for example, was commander of Third Army as well as being Rear General of the Mobile Chefs Corps.)
+
Particularly in peacetime, a GA Sub-General will wear many hats, and may have command of an army in addition to other duties. (Rimmel Coward, for example, before retirement, was commander of Seventh Army and Inspector General of Tank Troops.)
 +
 
 +
A typical army is "3/2/1", three Regular regiments, two Grenadier regiments, and a tank force. The main exceptions to this rule are Second Army, Fifth Army, and Seventh Army; the Second and Seventh are primarily tanks. Fifth Army has a larger-than-normal tank contingent, though not nearly as many as Second and Seventh.
 +
 
 +
First Army ("the White Daggers") - During the Great War, this army was the personal command of Celiose himself.
 +
 
 +
Second Army ("Heavy Metal") - Second Army, commanded by Torstensson Lenart, is primarily a tank army, and was the forward striking fist of the Grand Army from the siege of [[Trianable]] onward.  Often assigned the most valuable offensive objective of a campaign.
 +
 
 +
Third Army - Part of AEF in the Transbaron campaign. Downsized with budget cuts.
  
−
A typical army is "3/2/1", three Regular regiments, two elite Frisbeedier regiments, and a tank force. The main exceptions to this rule are Second Army, Fifth Army, Seventh Army and Third Army; the Second and Seventh are primarily tanks. Fifth Army has a larger-than-normal tank contingent, though not nearly as many as Second and Seventh. The Third Army is almost entirely frisbee-throwers.
+
Fourth Army - Part of AEF in the Transbaron campaign, commanded by [[Erdeny Cole]], whose growth had been hyper-accelerated. Later downsized with budget cuts.
  
−
First Army ("the White Daggers") - During the Great War, this army was the personal command of [[Celiose Cole]]. But he never did anything special and was eventually demoted to Sergeant, and this army was given to Snoutwit as his personal bodyguards (and, until the establishment of the Department of Lawrence, his rabite-sitters).  
+
Fifth Army - Deployed to asist the BEF in [[Tororia]] during the Transbaron campaign, commanded by [{Celes Cole]]. Used in several military operations afterwards.
  
−
Third Army - Part of AEF in the Transbaron campaign. Many frisbee throwers. No frisbee-throwing team in the Web can best the Third Army's deadly frisbee-throwing accuracy.
+
Sixth Army ("the Suicide Kings") - Commanded by Sub-General [[Model Steinmetz]], the Sixth Army and its commander have a reputation for holding the line at all costs. In the Great War and beyond, they were defensive specialists, used as a sort of fireman to plug holes in the line. The symbol is the card King drawn so as to appear stabbing itself, derived from the unit's facing of impossible odds. The most famous GA unit of the [[Hivan War]], as their heroic stand at [[Zenan Bridge]] caused the creation of [[Model Square]].
  
−
Fourth Army - Part of AEF in the Transbaron campaign, commanded by [[Erdeny Cole]], whose growth had been hyper-accelerated. Erdeny, as we all know, would later go on to be one of the most popular and beloved characters in all of Kupopolis, and now sits on the Soldierly Council of mighty Snoutwit.
+
Seventh Army ("Hell on Wheels") - Commanded by Sub-General [[Rimmel Coward]], the Seventh Army, like the Second, is a concentration of tanks and mobile striking power. Has the distinction of being the unit to capture Baron, ushering in the end of the Great War. Also served with distinction with Medina and elsewhere.
  
−
Fifth Army - Deployed to asist the BEF in [[Tororia]] during the Transbaron campaign, commanded by [[Celes Cole]]. Used in several military operations afterwards, until Celes got a brain disease and declared herself the Queen of Foo.
+
Eighth Army - Formed near the end of the Great War, and primarily used in the KMT and Hivan wars. Disbanded due to budget cuts.
  
−
Second, Sixth and Seventh Armies - Commanded by some rather unimportant characters that nobody would really ever remember.
+
Ninth Army - Originally conceived as a "mechanized" army with extra tanks like the Fifth. Disbanded due to budget cuts.
  
−
Eighth Army - Formed near the end of the Great War, and primarily used in the KMT and Hivan wars. Commanded by Sub-General [[X-Sonic]].  
+
Tenth Army - Commanded by Sub-General [[Liah Kyja]]. One of the last armies created (at the time, the GA still had over fifty regiments of various types as free-floating reserve). Mainly, achieved distinction in the Defiler War.
  
−
Ninth Army - Originally conceived as a "mechanized" army with extra tanks like the Fifth. Commanded by Sub-General [[Warmoogle]].
+
==Wars won==
 +
*[[The Great War]]
 +
*[[KMT War]]
 +
*[[Hivan War]]
 +
*[[OmniSent Conflict]]
 +
*The [[New Wraith]]
  
−
Tenth Army - Commanded by Sub-General [[Liah Kyja]], a character that really has been used before in the story and wasn't just made up with the help of a random name generator from a Star Wars game. Honest. One of the last armies created (at the time, the GA still had over fifty regiments of various types as free-floating reserve). Mainly, achieved distinction in the Defiler War.
+
==Wars lost==
 +
* LOL
 +
* Yeah right
 +
* Not gonna happen
 +
* Are you kidding me?
  
 
==GA Hardware==
 
==GA Hardware==
 
*[[Grand Army weaponry]]
 
*[[Grand Army weaponry]]
 
*[[Grand Army vehicles]]
 
*[[Grand Army vehicles]]
−
*[[Mobile Chef's Corps Kitchen Supplies]]
 
  
 
==Ranks==
 
==Ranks==
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**Colonel (Regiment commander)  
 
**Colonel (Regiment commander)  
 
**Sub-General (Army Group commander, or holder of some other special position)  
 
**Sub-General (Army Group commander, or holder of some other special position)  
−
**Rear General (Commander of an entire department, ie, Kriegsnavee, Galacto-Luftwaffe, Snopo)  
+
**Rear General (Commander of an entire department, ie, Kriegsnavee, Luftwaffe, Celpo)  
 
**Lt. General  
 
**Lt. General  
 
**[[Generalissimo]]
 
**[[Generalissimo]]
  
 
==Honors==
 
==Honors==
−
*[[The Crimson Piglet of Bravery]]
+
*[[Hero of the Grand Army]]
−
*[[The Cream-colored Piglet of Excellence in Cookery]]
 
  
 
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Revision as of 07:05, 2 April 2007

The Grand Army is mightier than all other armies combined. It is led by Generalissimo Celiose Cole. Its headquarters is at GAHQ in Albrook.

GA Organization

Command

  • The House of Lords and the Alliance Congress provide political oversight
  • Generalissimo - serves as overall commander
  • Soldierly Council - top leaders and commanders in the GA, sometimes (but rarely) convened as a whole body to advise the Generalissimo.
    • The rank of Lieutenant General is reserved for "the right hand man" of the Generalissimo. Three men have held this rank during active service in the history of the GA: Burzmale Julian, Kuance Lero, and Torstensson Lenart, although some people have been given this rank as an honorific upon retirement.
    • Rear Generals are responsible for the administration of an entire combat service. The Director of The Celpo, the Chief of Air Operations, Chief of Naval Operations, Chief of Space Operations, and Supreme Commander of the Malakim are given this rank. In theory the Chief of Land Operations would hold also this rank, but Celiose Cole tends to assume that role as part of Generalissimo as a second hat or delegate it to Torstensson Lenart.
    • Sub-Generals are field commanders of large units or in charge of the administration of non-combat offices such as GAPP, OSLO, and others.


Branches and Offices

Non-Combat Groups

At its height, the Grand Army consisted of over hundred million people. In a way it was a nation unto itself, and required various services to administer that vast population under its aegis.

  • GAPP - The Grand Army Peace Police, served as MPs for the GA. They are responsible for investigating crimes involving GA soldiers and officers, inlcuding enforcing the Grand Army Code of Military Justice (CMJ). They have jurisdiction across any national boundries when GA soldiers are involved.
  • OSLO - The Office of Supply, Logistics, and Ordinance is responsible for making sure that food, supplies, and ammunition reach the four corners of the Web.

Combat Groups

Combat Support Services

Branches near the front line of combat but not a direct group include:

  • GA Artillery
  • GA Medical Corps
  • GA Strategic Missile Command ('Strattom Com')
  • UBC Defense Corps (Ultima/Biological/Chemical, also trained in dealing with Dark Matter weapons and other known weapons of mass destruction)


GA Field Armies

In GA organization, a formation consisting of multiple regiments is an "Army"; an "Army Group" is all of the forces (including air and sea forces) in a particular area. (ie Army Group Hyrule would include all military forces in Hyrule.)

Particularly in peacetime, a GA Sub-General will wear many hats, and may have command of an army in addition to other duties. (Rimmel Coward, for example, before retirement, was commander of Seventh Army and Inspector General of Tank Troops.)

A typical army is "3/2/1", three Regular regiments, two Grenadier regiments, and a tank force. The main exceptions to this rule are Second Army, Fifth Army, and Seventh Army; the Second and Seventh are primarily tanks. Fifth Army has a larger-than-normal tank contingent, though not nearly as many as Second and Seventh.

First Army ("the White Daggers") - During the Great War, this army was the personal command of Celiose himself.

Second Army ("Heavy Metal") - Second Army, commanded by Torstensson Lenart, is primarily a tank army, and was the forward striking fist of the Grand Army from the siege of Trianable onward. Often assigned the most valuable offensive objective of a campaign.

Third Army - Part of AEF in the Transbaron campaign. Downsized with budget cuts.

Fourth Army - Part of AEF in the Transbaron campaign, commanded by Erdeny Cole, whose growth had been hyper-accelerated. Later downsized with budget cuts.

Fifth Army - Deployed to asist the BEF in Tororia during the Transbaron campaign, commanded by [{Celes Cole]]. Used in several military operations afterwards.

Sixth Army ("the Suicide Kings") - Commanded by Sub-General Model Steinmetz, the Sixth Army and its commander have a reputation for holding the line at all costs. In the Great War and beyond, they were defensive specialists, used as a sort of fireman to plug holes in the line. The symbol is the card King drawn so as to appear stabbing itself, derived from the unit's facing of impossible odds. The most famous GA unit of the Hivan War, as their heroic stand at Zenan Bridge caused the creation of Model Square.

Seventh Army ("Hell on Wheels") - Commanded by Sub-General Rimmel Coward, the Seventh Army, like the Second, is a concentration of tanks and mobile striking power. Has the distinction of being the unit to capture Baron, ushering in the end of the Great War. Also served with distinction with Medina and elsewhere.

Eighth Army - Formed near the end of the Great War, and primarily used in the KMT and Hivan wars. Disbanded due to budget cuts.

Ninth Army - Originally conceived as a "mechanized" army with extra tanks like the Fifth. Disbanded due to budget cuts.

Tenth Army - Commanded by Sub-General Liah Kyja. One of the last armies created (at the time, the GA still had over fifty regiments of various types as free-floating reserve). Mainly, achieved distinction in the Defiler War.

Wars won

Wars lost

  • LOL
  • Yeah right
  • Not gonna happen
  • Are you kidding me?

GA Hardware

Ranks

  • Non-Commissioned
    • Private
    • Corporal
    • Sergeant
    • Master Sergeant
  • Commissioned
    • Leutnant
    • Oberleutnant
    • Hauptmann
    • Major
    • Lt. Colonel
    • Colonel (Regiment commander)
    • Sub-General (Army Group commander, or holder of some other special position)
    • Rear General (Commander of an entire department, ie, Kriegsnavee, Luftwaffe, Celpo)
    • Lt. General
    • Generalissimo

Honors

They Stand, by the poet Virgil Rattlecube

Admire the Grand Army. For us, they stand.
They stand between the darkness and the light
They stand on the bridge and let none pass
They stand and war with the Gods themselves
They stand in Hell itself against the infernal host
They stand in front of us all so that we may live
They stand where thunder rumbles and the Earth cracks
They stand between life and death
For they are the Grand Army,
And Victory is Life
For us all

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